Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Couch. On fire.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
