? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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