All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
the raccoons are back...
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