halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize