i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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