Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so http://tfl.nu/bpeg
  Replies (29) Good night (736) Bad night (2076)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children. http://tfl.nu/5wvk
  Replies (16) Good night (3342) Bad night (990)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight. http://tfl.nu/nhc3
  Replies (47) Good night (1230) Bad night (4564)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving. http://tfl.nu/e2dg
  Replies (27) Good night (2944) Bad night (4643)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed" http://tfl.nu/ho10
  Replies (132) Good night (5253) Bad night (894)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach. http://tfl.nu/7dp2
  Replies (34) Good night (1422) Bad night (5307)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK. http://tfl.nu/aspp
  Replies (27) Good night (6426) Bad night (1003)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Disappointment?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces. (618): Disappointment? http://tfl.nu/lu72
  Replies (11) Good night (1535) Bad night (4180)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco. http://tfl.nu/eqmh
  Replies (11) Good night (4722) Bad night (1783)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.

  (1-925): View more from California

  If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often. (1-925): If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough. http://tfl.nu/t59l
  Replies (1) Good night (1666) Bad night (848)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt http://tfl.nu/8loq
  Replies (8) Good night (736) Bad night (2331)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.

  (214): View more from Texas

  I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle. (214): I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity http://tfl.nu/3j7l
  Replies (2) Good night (780) Bad night (396)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar. http://tfl.nu/4gsa
  Replies (0) Good night (654) Bad night (288)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  You're about wine.

  (585): View more from New York

  Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): You're about wine. (585): Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment http://tfl.nu/179v
  Replies (0) Good night (634) Bad night (274)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball... http://tfl.nu/m00r
  Replies (0) Good night (334) Bad night (191)

Randomize