Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize