Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
