my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize