as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize