all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
