Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize
