yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
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