If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Enjoy the penises
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
