my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
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