Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
