My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize