I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
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