is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
