Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Banned from zoo.
Again?
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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