Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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