I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
