David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
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