is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize