when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
No subtext here. People are naked.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
