It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
She tied me up with her honor cords...
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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