your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
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