You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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