piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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