I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize