ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.