Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
barbara walters just said penis...
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
