Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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