hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
