i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
