He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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