He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I AM VODKA MAN
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Randomize
