Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize