its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
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