I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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