so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
