wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
