I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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