Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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