Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
