girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug