Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
