I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Randomize
