I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Randomize
