Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize