i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
