Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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